Any Free Wine? Archive

_{An anonymous account of opening night at random art galleries from across Houston.}

Monica Vidal's opening reception at the Ms. Oh-so-perky-and-lovely Marie Weichman's Studio Gallery.

Well as you already know, I am not one to miss an opportunity to indulge in free libations and certainly not when they are being served at the one and only Studio Gallery in the Heights! The inside scoop is that Marie will shortly be closing the doors of the gallery and focusing on her own creative endeavors (a well-deserved change of pace for Marie!) and so with this added bit of information it became equally important to hustle over there and join in on the festivities. Although I must admit, I suspect with Marie's natural tendency to support her fellow artists this evening won't be her last public event, much like the Rolling Stones Final Tours.

In typical fashion, Chloe the Wonder dog chaperoned the wackiness synonymous with shows at Studio Gallery, and most of the night it was a good thing she did because she performed quite well at presenting a diversionary front-line defense, blocking the snack bar from the likes of Martin de Vore so that the rest of us could fill the old feed bags!

What about the WINE you wonder? Well, trying not to exaggerate, the wine was flowing like the Yangtze River back in 1931, only with a much happier outcome. There were great big happy bottles of both red and white for the taking, and gleefully parTAKE I did!

On my 15th return to the wine replenishing station Chloe the wonder dog actually ran interference on me! Who would have known that the bitch was counting and summarily cut me off on a whim! Needless to say, my feathers were quite ruffled until I discovered an ice chest full of beer outside the gallery and my world returned to its usual balanced and blissful state.

As the evening progressed I saw many an influential face pass by the smoking section on their way inside to view Monica's art. Of course I did everything imaginable to try and steal their attention, but alas, even pulling my panties off and swinging them over my head while singing my version of Helen Kane's "I Wanna Be Loved By You" wasn't enough. It was clear MOST of the attendees were present for the art, certainly not to rub shoulders with elite members of society, like myself.

I was told at one point Kinky Friedman joined the crew at the picnic table. Sadly, I missed his surprise visit for as soon as I returned from a trek to Marie's great bathroom with the incredible custom ceramic sink, Kinky had been replaced with none other than Max Harrison, who along with Michael own and operate the fabulous M-Squared Gallery, also in the Heights.

On a subsequent return visit to the head, I encountered a human roadblock as over-zealous, wine-drenched participants one after the other INSISTED on toasting Marie. Marie appeared genuinely touched by their words. I on the other hand, seemed to be the only one in the crowd who recognized their blatant swaggering sycophancy and my bladder was none too impressed with the love-fest either! Ultimately I was forced to run over to the Vietnamese Restaurant next door and use their restroom.

Unfortunately, I had left my purse at the picnic table and just so the staff wouldn't think I was a lowly bathroom crasher, I sat at a table with some nice unsuspecting folks and chatted with them for 10 minutes or so. As it turned out and much to my delight, the darling couple had brought a nice bottle of Three Thieves Napa Valley Cabernet Sauvignon with them and they didn't seem to mind at all when I sampled their selection before returning to Marie's place.

Like all good things, this evening was destined to come to an end. And because I admire Marie so much, I didn't want this to be a typical night on the town for me, that is having to leave abruptly with some big hairy man tossing me into a dumpster for throwing my drink at some thoughtless guest. So I hastily bid farewell to all the wonderful guests and headed over to the nearest ice house for a game of pool.

Oh yeah, I almost forgot to mention how very cool Monica Vidal's artwork is! Intense, detailed, and at times its 3-D quality made it leap right out at you!

Until next time, may you never confuse your turpentine with your wine whilst painting!

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